How To Survive an Alien Invasion

I have at last come up with a viable and effective way to save mankind from a hostile alien invasion.

All we have to do is cover everything in that impossible-to-open plastic packaging. I believe the correct term is Rigid Plastic Clamshell Packaging.

No one can open it. The aliens will abandon the planet in frustration. They will try scissors, chainsaws, futuristic laser technology, and even mind control. But, alas, that form of packaging is unpenetrable.

Each year, millions of people suffer from the effects of wrap rage. We, the consumers, are fooling ourselves to think that because we buy a product we should be able to access said product.

Frustration isn't the only consideration, it can be dangerous as well. According to BBC, over 67,000 people injure themselves every year in the struggle against clamshell packaging.

And now to add insult to injury:

"Hard to open packaging isn't just a dangerous nuisance, it discriminates against the weak," said Valery McConnell, editor of Yours Magazine.

In a world of equal rights and political correctness, should we be made to suffer such discrimination?

Below is a link to a top secret site with valuable information. After years of research and siphoning government money, WikiHow has developed a few methods to aid in the removal of plastic packaging. However, the aliens MUST NOT SEE THIS. (Click Here)

So there you have it. The next time you curse and cut yourself attempting the impossible--opening a plastic package, you can take some small comfort knowing that in the end, it will save the world.

Follow this link to read how I singlehandedly save the world from Zombies!